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Managing loneliness as an international student

无论您有两个朋友、二十个朋友还是没有朋友,您都可能会感到孤独,也可能不会感到孤独。如果您确实感到孤独或孤立,换句话说,如果您没有足够的社会支持或有意义的关系太少,您可能需要采取措施来改变它。大专学生,尤其是一年级学生,可能很难找到朋友、想家并且不确定自己是否有能力建立新的关系。新的人生篇章的性质几乎使孤独的经历不可避免。而且,这种现象不仅适用于新生;它可以适用于这个国家的任何新移民。 Whether you have two friends, twenty friends or no friends, you may or may not feel lonely. If you do feel alone or isolated, in other words if you don’t have adequate social support or have too few meaningful relationships, you may want to take steps to change it. Post-secondary students, especially first-year students may struggle to find friends, feel homesick and unsure of their ability to initiate new relationships. The nature of a new life chapter almost makes the experience of loneliness inevitable. And, this phenomenon is not only true for new students; it can apply to any newcomer to this country.

期待什么 What to expect

学校和部门为新生举办迎新会,以鼓励社交互动。有些是虚拟的,有些是面对面的。如果可以选择,您可能想亲自参加,这样您就可以与其他人面对面交流。请记住,这是结识新朋友并帮助寻求支持以应对学生挑战的绝佳机会。独自生活或完全在线学习可能会使这种社会适应更加困难。虽然花一些时间结交朋友很重要,但要在拥有社交网络与确保您有足够的时间和精力完成学业、工作和家庭义务之间保持平衡。 Schools and departments have orientation sessions for new students to encourage social interactions. Some are virtual and others in person. Given the choice, you may want to attend in person so you can meet face to face with others. Remember, that this is an excellent opportunity to meet new people and help find support to manage the challenges of being a student. Living alone or studying exclusively online may make this social adjustment more difficult. While it is important to invest some time in making friends, maintain a balance between having a social network and making sure you have enough time and energy for your school, work and family obligations.

解决方案 Solutions

愿意交朋友吗?首先将自己置于可以找到并被看到的位置。它可能经常光顾同一家咖啡馆或健身房,并经常坐在课堂或自助餐厅。有一件事是肯定的,你通常不会被发现独自坐在你的房间里! Open to making friends?  Start by putting yourself in a position where you are available and seen. It could be frequenting the same coffee house or gym, and sitting in class or cafeteria often. One thing is for sure, you will usually not be discovered sitting alone in your room!

参加有组织的学校活动,担任班级或学校职位的志愿者。即使参加一两次活动可以帮助您结识新朋友,那也是成功的。您可能必须迈出第一步,与您认识的人或恰好在您旁边的人开始对话。你可以邀请班上的某个人和你一起吃午饭、喝咖啡或散步。你可以加入你感兴趣的俱乐部或活动,尤其是那些会导致与他人互动的俱乐部或活动,例如体育俱乐部、辩论、政治、环保团体或慈善工作。这些机会很可能会增加您的熟人,并最终帮助您找到有意义的友谊。 Join organized school activities, volunteer for class or school positions. Even if attending one or two events helps you meet people, that is a success. You may have to take that initial step by starting conversations with someone you recognize or happens to be next to you in line. You could invite someone from your class to join you for lunch, coffee or a walk. You could join clubs or events that you have an interest in, particularly those that result in some interaction with others such as a sports club, debating, political, environmental groups or charity work. These opportunities you may very well increase your acquaintances and eventually help you find meaningful friendships.

高等教育学习不仅仅是教育和职业准备的时间。这也是个人成长、结识新朋友、扩大朋友圈和人脉的时候。对可能与您不同的其他人保持开放的态度可以帮助您培养对差异的宽容和欣赏,这显然是像加拿大这样的多元文化环境中的一项资产。专上学校是一个在同一屋檐下拥有如此多多样性的地方。 Post-secondary studies are not just a time for education and career preparation. It is also the time for personal growth, meeting new people, and expanding your circle of friends and contacts. Being open to others who may be different from you may help you develop your tolerance and appreciation for differences, clearly an asset in a multicultural environment like Canada. Post-secondary school is one place where there is so much diversity under one roof.

享受你自己的公司 Enjoy your own company

尽管你尽了最大努力,但你可能难以与他人建立联系。另外,友谊的起起落落是无法预测的。另外,试图通过经常陪伴你发现无聊、沮丧或浪费时间来减轻孤独感也不是一种好感觉。与与你没有任何兴趣或价值观的人共度时光实际上可能会更孤独。 Despite your best efforts, you may have difficulty connecting with others. Plus, the ups and downs of friendships can’t be predicted. Plus, attempting to alleviate feeling lonely by being in constant company that you find boring, upsetting or time wasting is also not a good feeling. It can actually be lonelier spending your time with people who don’t share any of your interests or values.

您可以做一些事情来享受自己的陪伴。评估您喜欢做的事情并找到重要的事情。这可能包括通过锻炼保持身心健康、探索新地方、追赶您最喜欢的作家、制作事物或了解世界大事的最新动态。此外,如果您正在做自己喜欢做的事情,您就更容易遇到同样喜欢的人。 There are some things you can do to enjoy your own company. Take stock of what you like to do and find important. This could include maintaining your physical and mental health through exercise, exploring new places, catching up on your favorite authors, making things or staying up to date with world events. Besides, if you are doing things you like to do, you are more apt to meet others who like that too.

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